A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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If you are on this site, you have a shitty life. It is even shittier if you read this.

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Womens rights

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What's the difference between a Jewish child and pizza? Pizza does not scream in the oven.

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A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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what did Dr. Dre say? Nothing you idiots! Dr. Dre's dead!

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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why did the chicken cross the street? ... ... ... oh... come on, ask why!

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Obviously way more than is considered acceptable or safe, considering his recent public outbursts and problems with addiction.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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