Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

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your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

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How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What happened to the man who just took a shit? He got a stunning pain in his anus because the earlier Hemorrhoid issues had now turned in to a open wound around his Anoderm.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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