There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

A Grape Soda inside a Chicken inside a Watermelon. Blackception.

Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

Your mother is so fat that it became a problem affecting everyone close in her life. Her new year's resolution was to lose weight, and surprisingly, has become quite healthy since then.

Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

A young penguin walks into a bar with tears streaming down his face. "Whats wrong with you?" asks the barman. "I've lost my Dad", says the Penguin. The barman asks, "What's he look like?"

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

I'm hungry.

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

Good afternoon.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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