Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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irish wristwatch JLR

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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Why did the black guy flunk out of school? Because his socio-economic conditions and his lack of support from his parents didn't provide optimal learning conditions.

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A horse walk into the bar, the bar tender asked, why the long face the horse unable to understand English takes a shit and walk away.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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What do you do at a club? You club.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the world. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

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YOLO

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Why did Cam newton win the heisman? Wait Cam Newton won the heisman?

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

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Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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