Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley, I live next door.

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

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It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his Martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go f*** herself."

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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KARL KARASHIAN - FACEBOOK

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How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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