I came.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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You suck big fat slobber

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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obama

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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