what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

Q: What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? A: Drowning.

Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

What do eagles and ground hogs have in common? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

Why was the black man at the back of the bus... Cause all the other seats were taken

What's big and white and can't climb trees? A fridge.

What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

Why was there a black man and a white man in a bar? Due to the probability of this occurance happening due to percentages of black/white people in a bar, this specific situation should be of no shock, in fact it is a completely normal occurance one of which should not be questioned

What's worse than getting raped by a black guy? Getting raped by a radioactive black guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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