Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many dead babies can you fit in my car? 37 1/2

thumb_up thumb_down +158

What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

thumb_up thumb_down

Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

69

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's big and white?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

like a cammel, lewis stores his weed in his back

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops