Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

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A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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i fondle myself every night....

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

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Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

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What do you get when you mix C4 with a lit- KABOOM!!!

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Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

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What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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