A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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LMFAO - "WE runnin' through these hoes like Drano?" Is that really what society has sunken to? Is this really what is accepted? Is this what we are jamming into children's moralities? Society is Screwed!

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why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

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What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

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The Bible

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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7

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I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

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what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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Q: Whats funny about the Holocaust A: Nothing

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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Garry Glitters on here

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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