knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

Q: What is the differenc between a Jew and a boy scout? A: The boy scout comes back from camp.

Good luck on your finals everyone!

A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

Q: why id the bird fly away from the boy? A: cuz he was scared

i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

Matt is not funny.

What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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