If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him

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Why was the boy considered a bitch? His name was Jason Jubin

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Knock Knock Come in

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?

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Hey, the eighties called, they were really excited about inventing a phone that could call the future.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street. Well actually, they just rolled a bit and then stopped. Peanuts don't have legs.

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Dogs in my home.

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I was going to tell a Holocaust joke, but I Jews not to. Anne Frankly, it's disrespectful. I'm sure you did Nazi that Hitlerious anti-joke coming.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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