A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +14

qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops