Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

A man and a prostitute walk into a bar. they have a few drinks then proceed to a hotel room where the man has sexual intercourse with the woman in exchange for money. The man then leaves while the woman stays in the hotel room and cries cause she hadn't achieved any of her dreams or life ambitions.

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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