Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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Q. What is the answer to life? A. 34

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

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What did the mushroom say to the carrot? Is this even important given the current state of world affairs?

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite joke? A. Nothing, because he cant hear.

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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