what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

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What does bigfoot have? Big feet.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

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stinky boner

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 1, 2 in mod7.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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penis

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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A man walks into a bar and asks for 6 vodka shots. The bartender looks at him in a strange manner. The man quickly downs all 6 of the vodka shots. The bartender looks at the man and says "Jeepers mate, whats the celebration?" The man replies "Well mate, first blow job today" The bartender in a kind gesture says "Here you go mate, next one is one me" while pouring another shot. The man respectfully replies, "No thanks mate, if 6 didn't get the taste away, im sure 7 won't"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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