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John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

What do you call a man with no legs, and one arm? Whatever his name happens to be.

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

cory is gay

Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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