A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

IF YOU ARE A GUY: Think about a really hot girl. She has the perfect chest, amazing face, blonde hair, and looks flat out stunning. She takes off her shirt which is very appealing and causes for you to get excited because you might get lucky. She takes off her pants, or skirt depending on the choice that you decided upon when imagining this girl, and is walking towards you in nothing but a bra and panties. She continues to take off her bra and gets on top of you. You passionately kiss and afterwords she whispers in your ear, "are you ready for some of this?" you nod your head and she proceeds to remove her panties. Let's freeze this situation for a moment. Assuming that you would ever be in a situation like that there has to be a catch right? A hidden camera, her husband comes home, a rabbid zombie crashes through the door...something. I am happy to tell you that there are no worries about this because nothing will stop you from making sweet and beautiful love to this woman. So let's get back to the scenario. You not your head and quickly tear off your clothes and begin exploring her body. Now turn her 64 and give her a penis with an amazing amount of pubic hair, make her fat, and submit to this manlady. You ask how this happened? Earlier that evening you took a particularly large amound of LSD, or acid if you prefer, and began tripping out. You began seeing ugly people as hot people, and hot people as ugly people. Your friends were concerned because you were hitting on a tree and started humping it at which you were removed from the party by your date who just so happened to be a fat and ugly hermaphrodite who repeatedly raped you and made you cry in submition to her kinky tactics. Drugs are bad, but they make for interesting stories for your friends to tell their children when they get older at your expense.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -44

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

thumb_up thumb_down +39

WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

yo mamas so fat, she started working out

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Is J.P. dumb? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Someone stole my cookie from the cookie jar! So I bought another cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Justin Bieber hits puberty

thumb_up thumb_down -9

vaginas are pretty!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is it called when a black guy gets robed A crime

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops