What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Q:How many babies does it take to paint a room? A:It depends how hard you throw them

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Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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A man walks into a bar. The barman says, 'why the lo-, wait, i thought you was that horse again.'

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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Why did the black kid pass the exam? Because he studied.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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this site is funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops