What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Sarah Palin

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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Why are black people so good at basketball? because they know how to run shoot and steal

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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