Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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what is the diference between a jew and a boy scout. a boy scout comes home from camp.

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Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

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what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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