Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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I'm gay.

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Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

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Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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Boob

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Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

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Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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