Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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James Patrick Campbell

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

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what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

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Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

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Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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Q: How do you get a black guy out of a tree? A: You cut the rope.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Probably just one.

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The Qur'an

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why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A horse walks into a bar, and is then put down because of the injuries it sustained from the impact.

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What break when you talk?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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