Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says Why the bloody face? The shark replies by saying my wife beat me with a stick. Considering that sharks cant talk, the bartender ends up going to the doctor to see if he may be dillousinal.

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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what do you call a black man with a job? dont know, has never happened.

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nazi flag

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Fat people

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

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call of duty world at war

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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