Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

ask me if im a house are you a house? no

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

Why do christians believe in God? Because believing in God is fundemental in their belief system; if they did not believe in God they simply wouldn't be christians. Muslims are in a similar predicament.

What is the difference between two little red cubes who are excactly the same in weight lengt colour etc. ??? One is actually a blue ball!

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

adam hodgson !

Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

MICHAEL

What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A piolet you racist!

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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