knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

V I T A M I N C !

Why was the man tired at his soccer game? Because he did not sleep well the night before

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

bish bash bosh giz a nosh

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

pudding

why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

How do you stop clowns from throwing cinderblocks at your car? Hire a hitman.

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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