Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

A Canadian man, American man and French man all go to a wive swapping party. The Canadian gets the American's wife, the American gets the French wife, and the Frenchman dies of a brain aneurism and the European wife. is very disappointed in her night.

The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

why wont me daughter eat my feces

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

What is the difference between Joe Paterno and Coach Sundusky? Nothing. They are both terrible human beings and should thoroughly punished for their actions/inactions and should serve time in prison.

I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

so the weather's nice...

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

We are lawyers

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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