There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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Windows Vista

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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ert

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Why did greg come to America? Because he wanted visit the states

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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