Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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well, I'm dying of AIDS, so....

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

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Q: What's black, blue, and dead? A: My wife after our fight last night.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

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Anything involving women..

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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