Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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Tunechi

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

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What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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Why did the black man go to the gym? Because he was severely fat and would live a short life if he didn't lose weight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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