what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

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Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

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Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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Asians

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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Roses are red grass is green get on th bed and I'll fill you wilpth my cream ;)

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Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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