whats white and pointless? chalk.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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This is on of those few moments where my guts and attitude leave me feeling as if the entire world is against me... ...Then I cant help but to smirk and think... The world against me? Finally a worthy challenge... Such a great day... Nero because fuck morals: Friends and not so friends do not call me Black Metal because I listen to power rock, my mother high on drugs attacked my wife claiming she was Satan, I killed my angel dust empowered mother, felt as if the world was against me... ...Such a great day... "I killed my father too but you dont hear me whining about it!" And of course... ...Rest in pieces oh "dear" mother", at least you did one good thing, you gave birth to your undertaker, while I killed you to end my lifelong misery, My only regret is ending yours... Now I request you all think I am a monster and pretend we live in a world where all parents are nice and good... You already deluded yourself? Perhaps you should thumb me up instead then.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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Your mom is so fat that when she steps on the scale, it displays a very large number.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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the holocaust

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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