Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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whats funny? laughing at people when they die a slow and painful death.

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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Why is your face? Because.

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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A van drives into a car.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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