"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

Why did paul macartny have plastic surgery? Because he wasn't happy with the looked

What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

what did the father say to his son whom had only one arm? hey son.

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

There is a car full of black people.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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