What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. *knock knock* -Who's there? -Not Suzy.

What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

Please ignore this statement.

Whats faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

Avery has crabs.

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

What is 8 times 4? 32

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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