Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

my gave me a game i said thank you

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

What's green and has four wheels? A dolphin. I lied about it having four wheels. I lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.

I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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