A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polish man and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw you and your wife doing it. Nyah, nyah, nyah!" The Pole answers, "You are a very rude, disrespectful, and inappropriate child. Where are your parents?"

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Life

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Fuck her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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