An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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