A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer. And a free haircut.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

4

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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