alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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why did the chicken cross the street dude get your facts right it is the road ok well why did the chicken cross the street LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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a man walked into a bar ouch

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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