batman has diarrhea

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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Toilet Sex, Toilet Sex I Love Toilet Sex!

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How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

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Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

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What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "I am an undercover police office and you're under arrest for prostitution, ma'am."

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What's black, white & red all over? A cow in a slaughter house.

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

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Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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amy copied adams haircut :0

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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