What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

thumb_up thumb_down +30

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock. Who's there? Batman. Batman who? Batman is stunned by the fact that there is in fact someone that does not know him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An asian without a future.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

...and I'm a Mormon.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

little potato when born allicator don't have neck, if u like me it's cause u stole my scooter

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops