Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Obamacare

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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Tim and Eric

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Why was the little boy speechless? His best friend was just run over by a plow truck.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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I walk into a bar...

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Why did the girl cross the road ? Because i was following her.

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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