A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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What's the difference of 13 and 4? 9

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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How did the baby cross the ocean? It was stapled to a whale.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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Your MUM has aids :D LOL

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Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

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dildo

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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the story below is a truee story...unfortunately!!!!!!!!! :'(

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Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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