Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

you know whats weird about italians? their italian

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Mind your own business.

How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

If I had xray vision I'd go to a black jack table and when the dealer dealt everyone there cards I would look at the hot girls boobs

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

Men's Rights

A married couple lies in bed, making out. They must really love each other.

what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME

What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

The white guy did it!

There was a white kid named Tyrone.

Please don't shoot me

whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

Lets Go Lakers!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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