a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

What is the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything in it? I'm not sure at rhe moment, but it will take aproximately seven and a half million years of thinking for me to find out.

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

A prostitution ring operates out of a subway. How much does the prostitute with a foot long penis cost? About $300, for a 12 inch penis is very rare and desirable.

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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