If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

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Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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One time I walked into a fat kid..

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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Woman's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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