Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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My Butthole.

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The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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what do you call cheese that's not yours? cheese that you stole.

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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we sat at the table and began to say graceme my sister, me and my mom we bowed our heads and closed our eyes and said grace we lifted our heads and opend our eyes and the food was gone my mom was gone and the chocolate in my pocket was gone (i wonder who did it lol)

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

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Why did the chicken refuse to cross the road? Yo dawg, dat chicken saw dat hoe Sally crossin da road, dat biatch got hit wit a fridge. Dat chicken was like "hell naw, yall must be trippin, i aint finna die over dat shiet homie, peace!"

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven died three months ago and was clawing on his bedroom window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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