What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

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how many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 283,000,322,249,390

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A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

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How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sorry, wrong number.

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When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

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A man and a woman are happily married. The die

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Why the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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Q: What's grey and looks good on policemen? A: A stylish grey hat.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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