I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a white guy a black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What Makes Me Smile? Face Muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

penis likes vagina cuz its straight (get it?? it has an erection!!!!!!)

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the T-Rex so bad at math? Cause it was stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Ebola How about you?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops