Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do owls and cars have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funnier than a comedic movie? Genocide

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

scientology.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red, Violets are violet.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

http://richardfigures.com/

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops