What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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A man gets home from work late at night and his wife is already asleep. Then he remembers that he forgot some important papers and has to drive back to work to get them.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy are stranded in the middle of a desert. After many days of not finding food, water, or shelter they contemplate cannibalism to survive, but can't decide who to eat. The mexican dies first for an unrelated reason

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

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Yo mama so ugly people don't like to look at her.

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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