im not food

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

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Women.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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There was once a man who lived in a box.

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why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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