I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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yeyeyeyeye live action

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A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

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The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

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What did the retarded black kid say in gym? Eugh eugh eugh eugh

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what do you call a masculine female? a post op transexual

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the game

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

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Your mom is not fat!

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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HURT

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Why? Because.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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FIRE!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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