A: Knock, knock A: Knock, knock A: Um, knock, knock! B: Sorry, I was pretending that I wasn't home.

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Justin Bieber is a good singer.

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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What's the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? I'll eat Megan Fox before I fuck her.

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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Get up Look in the mirror

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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Why should we dislike all the jokes on the Newest Page? Well you should too. >.>

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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