what do you call a kid in a wheelchair? . handicapped.

An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

what rhymes with ham and bread? girl, make me a sandwich

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

"Hello." "Hi."

Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

Knock knock Nobody's home.

When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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