Does pizza sound good for dinner?

A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

when do you go to heaven? Never

What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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