Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. "Knock, Knock" "Who's There?" "Not Sally."

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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why couldn't the bicycle stand up on it's own? because it was two tired

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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knock, knock whos there child molestor

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A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

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Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

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An Asian man fails a math test

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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