Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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children burning

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

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Guess what? You guessed it.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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Why, you might ask, did in fact the chicken cross this all too infamous road? His grandma-ma phoned the righteous bird and requested a visit. Chickens never displease their family.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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