A duck walks into a over 7-11 and says "Give me some Chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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25

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.

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Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an axe

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And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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what's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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Hi my name is Burp -you can call me Bu Nice to meet you

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women's rights, lol

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Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

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How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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What do you call a women in the kitchen? A caterer

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

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A blonde and a brunette both starred in a TV show.. It was called Beavis and Butthead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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