Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

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Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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