Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

women's rights

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

GAY PEOPLE

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

NO! Nero created the MULTIVERSE During the sixth day... And on the seventh... He did not get any sleep or rest either...¨ SO THE GREAT EXPLOSION OF ENDORPHIN'S WAS CREATED AND IT WAS GOOD! Moral:"Seriously, get lost, only the trio of the Gods Me,Myself, and I, are worthy of this tribulation!

What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

where are you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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