whats 7+4? 74

Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

can you pass the soap?

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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