what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Twenty-Four

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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why was the frog sad..... because it was stappled to the boys face

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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