Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

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Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

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Bend over Touch your toes I'll show you where The monster goes

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your pornography to the public??? ture. pornography is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems Nice tits

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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How many women does it take to drive a car? One. She had a sex change.

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Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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A dog was barking at a tree

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Why did the Muslim get on the plane in New York? To go visit his dying aunt in Memphis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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