I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

Q: are you gay? A: maybe

Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

Chuck Norris. I'm Done. That's my joke.

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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