Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

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What is 4 letters and made out of wood? Wood.

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i love huge wieners.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Yanter, Look it up

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

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Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

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[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

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Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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kevin kim

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what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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