How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

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Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

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Knock knock. Who is their? Grammar. Grammar who? Of course you don't know.

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A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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What did the mime say to the girl? .......

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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If you were a cactus, why?

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a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

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How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

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In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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