What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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How do u know that your obese ? People stare at you

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Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

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Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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White men's rights

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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