Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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Yes.

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What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

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Has u seen my grammar?

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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ORGANISM. Yeah, I thought it said "orgasm" too.

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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Why did the man rape the woman? He had a lapse in judgement.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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A Jew, Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have fun there a good time and then they go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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