what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

thumb_up thumb_down +14

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

tee hee

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violets are blue I'm ADHD oh look, a squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Cinema summer shits coming this year! Reboot edition ONE! Rocky BarBoler a older man with dreams of becoming a true boxing champion!... but will he succeed against the champion Apollo thirteen? Watch ROCKY To find out. Starring Mike Tyson as Rocky, and Justin Bieber as Apollo thirteen (Do I need remind you Rocky lost in his first movie?, Well that one is for you "Beleibers" because in the end you are misguided cuties.. most way to young for me, but you are as cute as you are silly). Moral: Loves cute girls... especially those over 16... legal age here... good luck calling us all pedophiles... They mature fast here, "beliebe" me, twelve year olds have fully grown boobs... what did you think I meant by cute? RAWR! Look but no touch is a okay for me mama Luigi. I just tend to call me once they turn 16...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

thumb_up thumb_down -10

CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops