Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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su algato es en fuego

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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if i could change the alphabet, i wouldn't its perfectly fine the way it is.

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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how many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? none their all dead.

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Look how far I can kick this bucket

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

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Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I'm not quite sure. I only took one year of Japanese in high school.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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