What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down -1

if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Arrow to the Knee

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Its true, he didnt write that!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Every time you log on to a porn site, somewhere a panda cub explodes. BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY. SAVE THE PANDAS.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man cry? He was grieving the death of his brother C.D

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops