What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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The WNBA.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

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Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kill children dont worry about it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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