what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Why did the owl visit the hospital? His mom was dying of luekemia.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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chuck norris

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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Why were Jews discriminated against for thousands of years? They weren't supposed to. Jews are people just like you and me. And for every ignorant person out there that hates Jews, you better watch your back because God is watching you.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

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gays

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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