What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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It's long!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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Q: whats big gray and cant swim A: a castle

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whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

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69

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What do you do in a one night stand? Stand all night long.

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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A blind man walks into a bar

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where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

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Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuck in its coop on the farm. Also, chickens aren't sentient, so they can't reason the same way we do.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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