What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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How do you get a clown of a swing set U hit it with an ax 2.5 times

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

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What do you call it when you eat cheese that's not yours? Stealing.

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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An Englishmen, an Australian, an American and a Chinese man were in a bar they were all friends who were having a drink together.

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I am High How about you?

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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