Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family weaped his final days of his life.

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

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An englishman, Irishman and scottishman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Irishman and englishman both jump off the cliff. The scottishman says "oh,shit".

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Whats black and has no ring? LeBron James

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How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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How many blonde's does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to hold the ladder and one to peel the carrotts

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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