Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

Penis.

Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Bacon is delcious.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Alex Gedrose.

7>6

Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

Q:Wy could't lily sleep at night? A: Becasue her eays were stappeld open.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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