whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

What do you a call a person who can't fly. A person.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

An Asian child flunks a test.

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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