Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

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Yo mom's so fat, she's overweight !

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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:/ Meh, I am just a side character anyways... Dont really care...

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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=3

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

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What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

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poop

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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