Two fish are in a tank. It is an average sized tank designed to hold aquatic animals.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to foodstuffs.

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What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? Nothing.She died on Thanksgiving day.

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Steve Jensen. Oh hi Steve, come in.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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You know what they say about people with big feet.......... They wear big shoes.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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josh simpson has cancer

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Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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Youre mom is so dead...

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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