What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

CFL

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

okay.....

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops