Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

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Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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Why couldn't the black man get a high-paying job? because he lived during the harsh and cruel times of slavery.

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

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Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Assuming the fact that these children are in fact deceased, it would be highly inprobable that they could perform any task. Or that they would need to see any light at all, since the point of that dark room is to keep them concealed.

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Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

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A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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