how do you make my dad say oww? throw a baseball bat at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock. Whose there? Jehovahs witnesses.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there? ........

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops