How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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How many teenagers does it take to change a light? 1. Unless he has some sort of disablity then probably 2.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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The Olympics

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A bear walks into a bakerey. He aks for a loaf of bread. The bakers asks: "White or brown?" The bear answers: "It doesn't matter, I'm on the motorcycle".

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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knock knock who's there? boo don't do this joke again- i'll make you cry if you finish it don't cry it is just a knock knock joke teeheehee

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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this is not a joke

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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Penis.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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