Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops