Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

What happens when you step on Jupiter? You cannot.

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

a horse nibbled a baby

Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

Roses are red, Violets are red, My house is red, I am on fire

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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