How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

You're Adopted.

my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Nothing. His parents are dead and Santa doesn't exist.

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple getting blow jobed by a giant squirrel

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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