whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

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What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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