What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +284

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your adopted.....

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to Liam? He Died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Kim Kardashian got a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops