What did one muffin say to the other? I'm baked... just kidding muffins are food and therefore can not speak

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A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

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"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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Q: Why was it bad to be a black jew during the Holocaust? A: You had to sit at the back of the gas chamber

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kieran is a homosexual

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a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Welcome to die!

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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