Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call a black man named mike

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +31

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a boy says hi.The girl says bye. The boy starts to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red violets are indigo

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats black and red all over? a chalk board

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops