The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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nolan is gay

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a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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hi

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whats the worst part about being a black jew your black and jewish

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

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Get it? More.

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

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Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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