Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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What's worse than an anti-joke? People who don't get the concept of an anti-joke and post regular jokes on this site.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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