Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

What did the boy do when he got an F on his English paper? -Laughed.

why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

mooooh im a cow

4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...