How do you keep an italian from talking? You duct tape his mouth.

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Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Whats cold and frozen? ice

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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WNBA

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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