What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

Q: What sucks? A: Straws

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawer? we are both lawyers

Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

Yes.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

A black man, a mexican, and a christain are on an island. There are also many other people on the island, since all of North America and South America is one giant land mass.

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

Why did the chicken cross the road? While I can never be entirely sure, I would assume that there was something on the other side which has peaked its interest.

How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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