A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

thumb_up thumb_down +12

chuck noris- can swim through land god- can walk on watter i- can run on air

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man who has been killed? A dead person.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +1,129

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Will you marry me?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops