What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

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Poop

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

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So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

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What do chinese people eat? Chinese food.

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What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops