What's big, grey and can't climb trees? A carpark.

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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Whats very large and produces alot of seamen. The US navy

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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A group of 3 black male friends sit down to have lunch at the basketball court. One black man reaches in his pack and pulls out a watermelon. The second black man reaches in his basket and pulls out some fried chicken and a pan of cornbread. They both look expectantly towards their friend as he opens up his pack. Right as he opens it, however, his cell phone goes off. Upon completing the call, he hangs up and looks at his two friends. "My financial aid got approved, guys!" he exclaims. Both of his friends congratulate him on finally making it to college. They are so proud.

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Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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Yo mama is so stupid that she is currently taking courses in a community college to get her degree in business so she can have a well-paying job.

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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