The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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What is worse then 10 babes nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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9/11/2001

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Racial Equality.

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So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

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how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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