Sex

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

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What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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A black man walks up to a bank teller and pulls out a gun, he proceeds to tell the bank teller he saw a white man drop it outside the bank.

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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Your computer will self - destruct in 5 seconds

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

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Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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want to hear a cheesy joke? ... cheddar

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Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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