I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

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Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

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Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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Why is it interesting to watch your mum shower? It's Not, its sick you pervert

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a serial rapist with a violent temper.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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Man 1: What's blue and goes blub blub? Man 2: I don't know what? Man 1: A blue blub blub. What's green and goes blub blub? Man 2: A green blub blub? Man 1: There's no such thing as a green blub blub you moron.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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why did the young teenage boy E J A C U L A T E? because he saw his sexy dad shirtless.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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