What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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Set up Punch line.

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knock knock you may come in

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What was the comment at the bottom of this anti joke? come up with a better anti joke

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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just in time?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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