A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

I love boobs

whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...