Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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ANDERS!! Thanks for the warnins, I mean I wuld beat you up even when I can barely move, but I just told the doc and the nurse to shut this door, thanks man, would never thought about that if you had not warned me... beat me up when I am poisoned? Your mom replied, it sasy "I do not like the idea" You know what I told you about not right? DO NOT THINK ABOUT A blue elephanT! WOSH BLUE ELEPGANT IN YOur MIND, ITS LIKE SAYING I AM NOT INTEREsted in KNOWING MUCH MORE! Your sister? YOu know she has a crush on me, ill fuck her so hard youul will know when she wont be able to walk straight or sit YES Id meet you, but you know... Ladies first... PS: OF Co0uRse iTS mY dick, in her mouth, it looks wrong because I AM FULL ON VALIUM YOu POISONOUS VENOM I wont turoture you, I mean not physically, but consider this the first picture, and if you want to see your mom and sister nekkid, then keep receiving picks. My skin is tan, yet they call me Black, the cloror of my soul. read below people, I am gonna bang his sistar, and his mom, watch out for the nekkid pics before they get removed on... Rate my ex, yeaaaah... any moment now, dont adress me anymore Anders, becuz the door is closed, and I cant saty awak anymore, nobody is coming in the doc said, its the bald guy with the smile, I told him to give you my phone with the last pic, he said maybe and asked if you wound nt get mad... Screw that phone, its full of your girlfriends nekkid pics anyways XD, he caught me sticking the finger btw, not the rest... And fuck you. Nero, the fucker.... Soon...

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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What's that in the road.... a-head?

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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If your flying upstream in a kayak and a wheel flys off, how many pancakes can fit into a dog house? None, because ice-cream is alergic to frogs!

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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How do you know when you're on a Jewish golf course? The players don't yell 'FORE' they yell '$3.99!' @Obsequiously

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Why can't jokes spit?

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every knight i see an owl at window

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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