Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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What do you get when you cross a gay eskimo and a black man? Nothing, as two male humans cannot reproduce.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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A blind man accidentally walks into a gay bar. The bartender escorted him out and pointed him in the right direction.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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The adventures of Helen Keller:

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A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

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There was an elephant , a bird, a man, a tree, a cat, a dog, a lion, a horse, a cow, a pig, a duck, a lemon, a turnip, an apple, a rabbit, a slice of pizza and a spoon. I just wasted around 8 seconds of your life

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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Why did the kid start to cry? His parachute didn't open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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