There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

so today i took a poop. hehe

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

Why did FiddleBob Joe chuck a stick of butter out the window? Because he wanted to see a butter fly

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

What did the asian parent say to his kid when he got a D? -It's OK son, you will do better next time.

A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

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3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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