What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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