What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

So one time there was this woman learning...

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

where did Lucy go when the bomb dropped? everywhere.

this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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