If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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There are two types of people in the world: humans

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

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What did the boy get for christmas? a new lining

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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why did the family have dinner? they were hungry and it was 6:00

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

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Poop

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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