Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

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What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

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Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

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Poop

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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a man jumps of a cliff and ..... hits the ground

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

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What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

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Jersey Shore

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

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what did one wall say to another wall? nothing walls cant talk

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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