why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

do you know what was a good idea? not last night

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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