What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

what do you call a black man in prison? justice.

Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

ROSES ARE RED FRIENDS ARE FRIENDS, NO MUTUAL FRIEND, WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO ADD ME ON FACEBOOK BITCH!

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

Knock Knock Who's there? Kelly Oh hi Kelly! Long time no see! I know! I've been my working fingers to the bone ever since I got that promotion and I barely have any free time! That must be tough. It is but it pays bills! Being a mother of three isn't a task for the faint of heart. Now Kelly,I was wondering how you thought of the remodeled kitchen....

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" Surprised, the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named 'Bob'?"

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

why did tyler detweiler walk across the street? he didnt he has ceribral palsey

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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