"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Interrupting kid with ADHD" *I did not respond, as I knew he would interrupt me before I was able to finish the sentence.*

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What will happen when a black person die they die

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's worse than a baby in a blender? Two babies in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -7

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

So a blonde woman gets into her car. She then drives to the grocery store because she is hungry and wants to buy food to make her dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops