So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

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Two friends sit down to dinner, the third is late so they eat him

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Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What do you call a black lady with big boobs? Oh, wait, it's just a fat black guy.

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

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While I was having sex... Just kidding, I can't get laid.

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Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

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What is black and white and cant get through revolving doors? A zebra with a spear through its head.

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Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

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What's the difference between and Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout returned from camp.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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