A guy walks into a bar. But this was a bar like a pole, so the man ended up with a broken nose.

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

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How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

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Q.What do you call a apple with a unibrow? A. A failed science experiment!!!

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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