A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

I have aids

Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

What did the anorexic order for dinner? Nothing

Why? Why not?

Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

This is Heading 1

I lost my tractor.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.