Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

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You know what's gay?? Lesbians

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what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

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Gadaffi

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

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Why did the man have a hole in his head? He was shot.

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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How did the Jews get out of Germany? They didn't..

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Bumsniffer

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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Q: Why did the black man fall off of the cliff? A: He was the victim of a hate crime and his body had to be dumped somewhere

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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