What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

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matt is fat

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

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How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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Hello

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

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How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Why did the dead chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was dead.

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What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

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A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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69

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops