Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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Can you guess the following words? Boo*s s*x *orn g*y cu*t b*tch Answers: Books, six, horn, guy, cult, batch.

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What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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