Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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A boy tells his friend a 9/11 joke. The boy's friend says "Don't joke about 9/11, my dad died in it." "I'm sorry I didn't know.", responds the boy. "Yeah, that's the last plane he ever flew"

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Do you like fishsticks No

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

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My parents died!

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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