Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Sex. That is all.

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guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

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I Love You Jordan! P.S. from someone you know

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Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

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s e m e n

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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30cm = 0,3meters

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Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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Baseball

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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