why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +3

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

thumb_up thumb_down +61

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

thumb_up thumb_down +35

96

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red and have big balls woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Jews

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened to the toddler on the swing? She was left unatended and was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops