There's my tractor.

Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

A blind man walked into a bar and got a beer and got drunk and went on a rampage and killed YOUR MOM

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

What's 1+1? 69.

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? Answer: Newton's Law dictates that they would hit the ground at the same time.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

Wanna hear a joke? no

And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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