A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

thumb_up thumb_down

"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down -41

why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse then being HIV positive? Catching the cold the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

This Anti-Joke is funny. haha.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The Pope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll ya have, Pope?" But the Pope's grasp of English is tenuous at best, so he mumbles something in Latin. The bartender doesn't know any Latin. The Pope gets frustrated and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops