Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

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Alan: My Grandfather has a jacket made from jews that he killed while he was in the SS. James: Really? Alan: No, I'm Korean. My Grandfather would not be allowing into the SS.

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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Billy: Mom.... Dad, I have decided that I want to live on my own. Parents: Great son! We're so proud of you! Billy: Thanks for your support! Your luggage is outside by the taxi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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