A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

Why did the girl fall down the stairs? She has no legs, that's why.

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

Why did the boy drop the ice cream? So that it would melt and he could dip his dick into it and his mom could lick it off.

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

What do you call a cow with no legs A cow with no legs.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

What's bigger than China and Smaller than my penis? Russia and a smaller penis.

Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

the blonde choked o a gummy bear. What happened next? she went to the hospital

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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