Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

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A man stand's on a chair Then he fall's off

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Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

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What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops