When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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Q: Why didn't Jack go up the hill? A: He had prior engagements.

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what do you call a man with no legs? An ambulance as he seem to be bleeding very heavily.

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

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What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

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copy me and i will kill you

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Not all black people are skilled at basketball

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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