What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody fight between a black and a white man.

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

Boobs are nasty!

What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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