What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

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a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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