What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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30cm = 0,3meters

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Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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yeyeyeyeye live action

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Baseball

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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