A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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what do you call a white and black girl 69? ying yang

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Your momma's so fat...

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Why couldn't the girl brush her hair? Because she had leukemia

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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One below was by me: Walter H

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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