I like to eat.

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

To (down) Below: BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOL! MWAHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHO HEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA... Man I cant breathe! YUCK YUCK YUCK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! AHAHA! HOHOHOHOHOHO HAHAHAHAHA!

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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