Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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