Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he obviously had to attend to his planned schedule which involved a meeting which was to take place on the opposite side of the road.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

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I know you are but what am I? Gay.

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Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

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What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

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What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops