Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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I can count to potato.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Why was the monkey sad? Because somebody stole his banana. Why was the monkey happy? Because your parents are dead.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Wanna know a funny word? Pickle-weasel.

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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You're mother is so fat the doctors say she has a serious obesity problem and will most likely have to go on cholesterol pills and begin regulating her diet properly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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