Why don't people say YOLO anymore? They all died in car crashes while texting and driving.

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

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whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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69

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Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

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Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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