A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

oh hai

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

What happened to the man that jump out of the airplane with no parachute? He landed on a baby and both died almost instantly. The authorities were called and they took care of the situation flawlessly.

Why did the old man die? He died because he saw the light wich happened to be a street light in the distance.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

Black People.

Why was the man sad? His wife left

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

Fat people

Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

Nobody cares.

What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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