What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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what did the horse say to the other horse Neigh

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

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How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

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A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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How do you kill a black man? You drop a fridge on him.

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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Why did the little boy run away from Michael Jackson? Because he was scared

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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What's the difference between an apple and an orange? 87

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

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Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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Spread the net.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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