What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

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What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

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Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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