Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Bryson got a concussion...he died

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I love boobs

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Boobs are nasty!

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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