The Braves win the N.L. east

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

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A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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