Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson molested boys.

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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what do i refer too White people = Business Yellow People = Smart Black People = Drug Smugglers, Terrorists, Rapists etc

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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