Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

Why did Justin Bieber break his leg? Because, like you and I, he is faced with the same challenges and dangers on a daily basis, and should all take necessary precautions in his every day life.

John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

Wanna hear a joke? Woman's rights.

What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

hi

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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