I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

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What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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