So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

IMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM a beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee immmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooodfssgihsfdiug

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

What's up? A direction...

A car enters a curve. An ice-cream man pops out from a manhole and throws a pine cone to the car.

what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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