A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A large Albanian man jizzing on the pile.

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

Throughout her entire pregnancy Sheniqua smoked, drank, and did many narcotic drugs such as heroin and cocaine. Why did she lose her baby before coming to term? Because I strangled her to death for being black.

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

Kefka > Sephiroth

what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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