A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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women's rights

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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