What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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Why are hurricanes named after women? I don't know I was asking you

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

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What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops