Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

4 is half the number 8 is.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the American family left the McDonald's with freshly bought chicken nuggets in their possession, and needed to cross the road to return to their home and eat said chicken.

why did Mark Nara cross the road idk why? he didnt

How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

What's long and black? A line at KFC.

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

smell the vitamin C

A mexican man killed a black man yesterday. It had nothing to do with his race, he just had a very rough childhood and wasn't taught moral values.

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

Yo Mama so stupid because she's been addicted to marijuana since she was a teenager, and has lost many brain cells. Resulting in her forgetting simple things like your birthday, her own name, etc. She has also developed lung cancer. She's predicted to die in two months if she continues to smoke as she does now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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