What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

A blonde walks into a bar. She says ow

You have friends

Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

i like my woman how i like my coffe... without d i c k s

whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

Q. What is worse than having 100 dead babies nailed to a tree? A. Having 100 dead trees nailed to a baby.

You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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