Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

roses are red violets are blue tulips are white daisies are yellow

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

a black man pays his child support

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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