I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

What's a Jew's favorite food? You would have to ask on an individual basis because it is unfair to say that all Jew's have the same favorite food

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

what's the fastest way to have someone murder you tell your wife you are cheating on her

Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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