How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

thumb_up thumb_down +19

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats worst then dieng in a videogame

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Your mother just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Vaginal secretions

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? One crawling out of the bottom licking its lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops