Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

What do you call a book of notes? A notebook.

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

You're mother is so fat the doctors say she has a serious obesity problem and will most likely have to go on cholesterol pills and begin regulating her diet properly.

Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

black people. that is all...

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

Nothing yet CC

Why didn't the girl make it to the other side of the road? A police officer stoped her because she was j-walking.

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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