why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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What was the comment at the bottom of this anti joke? come up with a better anti joke

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

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Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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