Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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Knock Knock Yes?

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How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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