Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

It is true that Trump will make America great again.

Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

An escalade with 5 black men crashes off a cliff and all of them die. this is terrible. an escalade seats 7.

Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

"You know what sucks?" "vaccuums?" "you know what meteforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "you what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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