Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Women's rights.

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Knock knock. Who's there It's Jim O ok come on in

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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How do you baby sit a black child? Entertain him with stimulating games to help with his cognitive growth.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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Chuck Norris died.

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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A guy walks into a grocery store. He asks a lady where the potatoes are. She says on isle 5 He goes to isle 5, but there are no potatoes.

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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