Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is a bully. every day 7 ate 6's books and punches him. 6 would go to 9 but today 7 ate 9

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Rebecca Black

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops