What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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