Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What's Red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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Thats what she said......about the project proposal, it was some really valuable input.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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just in time?

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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