Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A guy asked his Girlfriend to marry him. She said Hey! a Dump Truck! and the mental Boyfriend forgot all about the Proposal and was amazed by the Dump Truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +132

Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do poor black guy and poor white guy have in common..................................................... their poor

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops