Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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aa

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That's illegal What? Your mom

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since when?

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

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Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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