A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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Q: what happed to the squirrel that lost his nuts? A: it died

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Why did the black man rob the bank? Well..why not?

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What happen when you put a Ciara and a Charlie together? They have sex.

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April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

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Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

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How can you tell the person who stole your car was black? Stereotyping is wrong.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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