what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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women's rights

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Two juggalos go to an Insane Clown Posse show.

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

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My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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What's the difference between Vagisil and Black People? They are disgusting!

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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9

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

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Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

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What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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