John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

thumb_up thumb_down -120

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops