A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Q: Whats green and has wheels? A: Any form of motorized vehicle that is made for transportation and has a green paint scheme.

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No because your face is really f***** up.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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