I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Buttercups are yellow Thats about it

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A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

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Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "why the long face" The bartender then sees the horse's broken leg and proceeds to buy him a free drink.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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2 black kids walk into school

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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What's a Jew's favorite food? You would have to ask on an individual basis because it is unfair to say that all Jew's have the same favorite food

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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