What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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tom pauling

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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jews

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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A gay guy and a blind man walk into a bar. It's a gay bar. The blind man is also gay.

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A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

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what is an antijoke? a type of comedy in which the joke ends in an antivlimax that it is funny in its own right GDS*

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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