Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

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Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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A Jew walks into a furnace.. The bartender says "What'll you have?" The Jew wonders why there is a bartender in this furnace, then they die.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Nickleback.

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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Q:what is a wheelchairs biggest fear A: steps

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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