Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's black and doesn't work? My Blackberry, but luckily it was still under guarantee and the situation was solved swiftly and relatively drama free.

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Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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