Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

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Why didn't the cheese buy a house plant? Cheese is nonliving and therefore cannot earn money, thus preventing cheese from buying houseplants.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

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"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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I completely thought you where bullshitting me, how come I never noticed before? How and why?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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