Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

womens rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

What did the black man say to the asian man? Whats up man!

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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