Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Two friends sit down to dinner, the third is late so they eat him

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what is big and green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A snooker table

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Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

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What are pirate movies rated ? P.g 13 for violence and coarse language.

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

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your mothers smells so bad,because she has poor hygiene skills

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whats black and white and red all over????? a zebra who got shot

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Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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