Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

thumb_up thumb_down -24

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -15

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The Blonde walked into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

i like pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did samba hurt her head? Because she fell out of her mum muff

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than The Holocaust? CREED...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops