Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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Teen pregnancy

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

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Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

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What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

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Who hacks darts? • Jack Nolan aka Bowlbot 300 J-Bowls

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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