Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you stop a black man from spitting? People of all races and colours are quite within their right to spit on their own property whenever they wish. However if anyone spits on or near you, you could report him to the police, but don't expect to be taken seriously.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Elizabeth Warren

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops