How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

thumb_up thumb_down

b

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the man at the tuna fish factory mad? because he was going through intense emotional trauma happening in his life because of problems with his wife and child.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

thumb_up thumb_down

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops