Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

Your mother is a man.

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

A Jewish man joins the German Army. He serves with distinction during the First World War, receives several commendations for bravery, and is one of the 12 million people killed during the Holocaust.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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