There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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What didnt rebecca black do today ride the bus

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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c======3

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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what do you call 10 dead babys lunch

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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