Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

baby seal walks into a bar

Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because seven "eight" nine. Yeah, I went there.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

george goodburn is secretly mexican

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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