what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

since when?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your Mamas So Fat That When She Jumped Into The Ocean All The Whales Swam Around And Started Sinqinq (We Are Family Even Though Your Fatter Than Me.)xD

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

thumb_up thumb_down -4

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Pen15

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops