How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

i saw amango it splootered

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

thumb_up thumb_down

GIRLS that think they can out-drink MEN.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was Cathy sad. Her husband Drew was killed by a land mine on a peace keeping mission to Iraq.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You know you guys are suppose to post jokes, not basketball comments.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops