What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

99% of teenagers would cry if they saw justin bieber on the top of a skyscraper, about to jump. However, there is 1% who would be sitting in a lawn chair at the bottom screaming, DO A BACKFLIP!!!

what do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? a surgeon.

Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho Cheese! Anti Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Sally's Cheese

What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

It is true that Trump will make America great again.

Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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