roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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Barack Obama

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

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an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

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lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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