A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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2 black kids walk into school

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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Q: A Blonde and a Brunette fall of a building which one hits the ground first? A: The Brunette because she ways 200 pounds and the Blonde weighs 100.

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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Go away.

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Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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