what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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