How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

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In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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A Jew! Bless you.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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how did the girl fall off the swing. BECAUSE SHE HAD NO ARMS HAHAHAH

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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How do you call a white guy surrounded by 9 black guys? Steve Nash.

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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