What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

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Why did the young teenager cut class? To cut himself! Get it?! Its a pun!

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What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

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Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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