Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Ben is gay

A girl gets raped -teagan d

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Billy and Suzy sitting in a tree... Billy is gay.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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