why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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so david walks into a convenience store and wanted to buy a pack of gum. so he asks the cashier how much is the gum and the cashier said that it is 99 cents and then david said oh no! i thought it was 98 cents.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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