Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

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A Jew walks into a bar screaming cause he just broke his face

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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if you have two gay people, would their kid be gay too? oh wait....

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

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Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

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Why did Gus go to the HC? Because he got high off his ass.

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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why was the boy sad? because.

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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