What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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NEIL PERT IS THE GREATEST DRUMMER OF ALL TIME!! I LOIVE SMOSH VIDEOS I SEENT EVERY ONE LOLOL

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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A: Is this the Krusty Krab? B: No, this is Pizza Hut. Please stop prank calling us.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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sweaty black guy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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