So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

People just dont care about me, yesterday I got a coconut in my head and... AWWWW thats horrible! Yeah I... So did the coconut make it?

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -Why? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

How do you make Justin Bieber handsome? He already is!

what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

What do you call a Jewish police officer? It depends on if you are Mel Gibson or not.

Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

European on my shoes, buddy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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