what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

thumb_up thumb_down

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Wha'ts the funniest joke in the world? Written.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +25

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

That awkward moment when you wonder why this person keeps stepping on you, and you realize that you’re a shoe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

NEVER

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you park a new Cadillac with a roll of $100 dollar bills on the dashboard in a black neighborhod? Many residents of that peaceful community will briefly glance at it and admire the wealth of the automobile's owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops