Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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hey guys im gay

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Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

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In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

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Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

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How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

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Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because he was Pierre preasured by all you assholes Saying he already did it so now he feels like he Has to do it.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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#IHateHashtags

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What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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