what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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There are four types of people in this world. I never said I would name them all

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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What was Hatsune Miku's last word? bokuwaumaresoshitekizukushosenhitonomanegotodatoshittenaomoutaitsuzukutowanoinochivocaloidtatoesoregakisonkyokuwonazoruomochanarabasoremoiitoketsuinegiwokajirisorawomiageshiruwokobosudakedosoremonakushikizukijinkakusurautanitayorifuanteinakibannomotokaerutokowasudenihaikyominaniwasuresararetatokikokororashikimonogakietebousounohatenimieruowarusekaivocaloid...

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Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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Schroedingers cat walked into a bar... and it didnt.

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Justin Bieber got laid

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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Your Mother

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Why was Andy's resume declined? Because he was molested as a child.

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Why did the man tell the child to get into the van? They were late for a field trip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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