whats 2+2? 69 LOL

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He didn't, the farm this chicken was on had fences bordering it to avoid this very situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Who's there? Probably

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your Mum is soo fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walked into a bar, and clutched his stomach in pain as it was a steel bar and it hurts when you walk right into a steel bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock! Who's there?! Michelle Bachman.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops