how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

whats long and black on a black guy slavery

I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she heard there would be quaffles!

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

Why did I write this anti-joke? Because I am generally not that funny.

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

Whats black and white and red / read all over * a bloody penquin * nun falling down the slairs * news paper * a clumsey panda

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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