Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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my mom raped yerr foot

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

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what do you call cheese that is not yours? stolen property

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

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Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

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Oh...okay, good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops