A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

Knock Knock Whos there? Its dad mom died....

Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

Q) Why did the Koala fall out of the tree A) Because it was dead!

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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