What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

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Adam Chebali has no life

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Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A retarded man walks into a bar and everyone was polite about his disability.

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How do you register on webkinz? You put a rope around a durable shower neck, & then hang yourself with it.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

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IU football

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops