A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

A shark ate your mom

Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

Waffles ate my grandma

Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

Womens Rights. Excist in nearly every country on Earth today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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