Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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Thats what she said......about the project proposal, it was some really valuable input.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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21

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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just in time?

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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