What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a woman starring at him, she seems attractive... he walks up to her and realizes that sheis quite mediocre if not even ugly. He proceeds to say "You'll do"

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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Donald Trump

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What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

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clamidia

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What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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