Q:Waht did the blind deaf kid get for chrismas? A: Cancer

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

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a man and a woman are standing at a bar. they have a few drinks and then go home and die.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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Jimmy Saville

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

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Women's Rights

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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Whats worse than dieing of Alhzymers? Anal Rape

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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I saw a shovel once.

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Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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