What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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what starts with 's' and ends in 'ex' and muslims get a stiffy from it semtex.

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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a Jew had a small nose

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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*Knock knock! "Who's there?" "Jehovah's witness" .....

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

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What is the difference between a black man dead in the middle of the road... and a deer dead in the middle of the road? One is a human and one is an animal

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Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

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Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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