Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

Every time you log on to a porn site, somewhere a panda cub explodes. BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY. SAVE THE PANDAS.

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I LOVE YOUR MOMA CAUSE SHE STINKS OF POO :) BY VICKY CASSIDY, RENATA SZABO, ELLA AND HEIDI MCMILLAN

Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a person and one is a pizza.

Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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