A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia? A: Sexy children.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

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Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

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Yo mama so fat... Her doctor told her she's morbidly obese and she has 2 years to live if she doesn't change her eating habits and exercise regularily.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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