What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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There's my tractor.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

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why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

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Contrary to popular belief when life hands you lemons you cannot make lemonade. Water and sugar are two other essential ingredients.

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What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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