what did the cat say to the potato? meow

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A dog walks into a bar. the bar tender asks" what'll you have?" the dog does not reply because dogs have not yet developed the type of voice box required to speak or the learning cappacity to be taught the English language.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a group of asians? China.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops