A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Women's rights.

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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lololololololololol

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Why did the little and energetic girl fall down? Because I snapped her neck.

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

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Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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