Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

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Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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69

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

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. . I am a whale

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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Q: How can you fit 1000 jews in one car? A: The Ashtray

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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Why do black people log onto blackpeoplemeet.com? To meet black people.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What do you call a baby girl that has grown up? A women

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So, I'm sitting by this guy in Science class and we're learning about fungi. So this guy is being really nice and I tell him, "Bro, you're just a FUNgi to hang around", like fun guy.

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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