Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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Knock knock --Come in.

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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your life

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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b r o k e n k e y b o a r d ! ! p l e a s e h e l p ! ! ! ! !

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o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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