How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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An illegal Mexican immargrant was deported for the selling an use of marijuana. the sad part is this happens everyday

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Mooses

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops