Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

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two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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Why was the math book crying? Three men just brutally raped his wife.

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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outside your comfort zone

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

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what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

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Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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