my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

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what did hercules parents tell him? You're adopted

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am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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2 black guys are riding in a car, whos driving? The cops.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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