Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

YES! EXACTLY!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

I scream. You scream. We all scream.

What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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