What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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What did Hitler say to the Jew? I don't know, I don't speak German.

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Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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democracy

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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what's up? my penis.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

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This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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a black man a chinese man and a mexican man are all on a plane. they land safely and continue with their lives.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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