A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Get up Look in the mirror

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

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What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

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I LIKE TURLES.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

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this website...

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know whats funnier than 24? 25.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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What happened to the baby that wondered into oncoming traffic? It got hit by a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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