A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

Q:How many pancakes can you fit on top of as doghouse? A:Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.....

What is next?

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

I thoroughly dislike arabs, I lost both my parents in the events of 9/11.

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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