an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

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lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

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what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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