What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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meh

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When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

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Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

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A Jew walks into a furnace.. The bartender says "What'll you have?" The Jew wonders why there is a bartender in this furnace, then they die.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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Nickleback.

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Please don't shoot me

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others dont

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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Q:what is a wheelchairs biggest fear A: steps

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How did baby Bobby spend his summer vacation? He didn't, he died from heat exhaustion.

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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I'm gay.

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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