Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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guys cmon dont make fun about abbie make fun of josh brown WHAT A NOOB

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" Surprised, the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named 'Bob'?"

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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What is the differnece between the chair and the pot? You can't cook in the chair.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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