WUT SMELLS ? my poo

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Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

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one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What's bigger than China and Smaller than my penis? Russia and a smaller penis.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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One day a priest walked into a prison to bring lost souls to the Lord.....Not his best idea.

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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