How do you make a clown sad? Brutally murder his children.

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I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

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What's up? The sky.

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What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

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A women left the kitchen.

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Where's my tractor?

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

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What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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I am really good at math debating

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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