A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

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I friended Paul Walker on Xbox, but he's always in the Dashboard.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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7

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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tom hall

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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Dislike this.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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1: What is a gum wrapper with no gum? 2: A wrapper? 1: No.

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Poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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