Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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Even better if I am not here in an hour, lets make it two huh?, I was thinking about you, sleep is well, not something I prioritize well enough at all, probably why I am so adrenaline crazy.

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why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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What's the worst thing about gang rape? Going last.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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A black man, an Asian, a Jew, and an American all jump off a building. Unfortunately, they all died on impact and their families will mourn for years to come.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

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why did the frog cross the road it was stapled to a chicken

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops