Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

thumb_up thumb_down +2

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

thumb_up thumb_down -18

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +25

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

thumb_up thumb_down +23

One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

thumb_up thumb_down +27

nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops