Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

Is your refrigerator running? If so, it sounds like you've got a well manufactured, correctly working appliance. If not, you might want to either have a technician come over and look at it or you should simply replace it with a working one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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