An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, but the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk!

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Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

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A fat African a rich mexican and a gay guy jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The gay guy because fat Africans and rich Mexicans don't exist

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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Rush Limbaugh

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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A seal walks into a club.

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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