A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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An elderly man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Dad!" The old man replies, "Hi son. I'll have a Bud Light." The bartender serves his dad a Bud Light and says, "I'm thinking about going back to school to become a doctor." The old man says, "I'm an alcoholic." The bartender replies, "Great, another Bud Light coming up!"

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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