How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Yo momma is SO black.

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How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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Girls

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Justin Bieber.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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