Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

Women's rights.

your mama is so greasy she should go take a bath

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Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

matt f stupid because no one likes him

What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

david your girlfriend has a nice ass

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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