How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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Caitlyn.

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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