A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You will NEVER guess what just happened!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

yo momma is so tall shes tall

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's 9+10=? 19

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whay lawrence pearson ir r8 gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops