How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

why do fat people eat so much? who cares

Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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