How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

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Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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Why did the dog eat poop?

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Black, det er geita, banke driten ut av Anders, han griner, dreper ikke, vil du ha telefonen eller? Jeg kommer med den litt senere, skal bare tørke blodet først pønsha han hardt i tryne blør ifra knyttnevene, skal jeg knekke bena på han eller noe? Geita. Ps Pen fitte har du flere bilder av a elle? Hvilket rom?

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

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Roses are black, Violets are black Everything is black I can't see

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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A guy trips a blind man.

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Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? (No answer)

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What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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