When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

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Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

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what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

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Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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