What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

thumb_up thumb_down +28

David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops