How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

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How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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What did the Scientist say to the bookstore owner he met? "Hi."

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Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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Hi

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? I don't know but it's not the little girl.

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have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

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A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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