What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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how many pancakes does it take to get fat if u answered this question your already fat

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What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

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( o Y o )

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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If i could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't put U and I together. I'd put my dick in your mouth.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

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What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

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What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

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What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops