whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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hi

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Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

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whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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