Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

17

Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

As a kid I was always told that school would get me good places. As an adult, I have found that there is another thing that gets you into a good place. Shrooms.

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

How old are you like 10? Im 11 so shut the fuck up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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