Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The blondes on the opposite part of the lake is a pretty good joke

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

thumb_up thumb_down +17

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -124

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops