Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

Wanna know something funny? Your face

What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

How do u shit With ur ass

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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