Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

Who hacks darts? • Jack Nolan aka Bowlbot 300 J-Bowls

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

The New York Giants

Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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