(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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wanna hear a joke?... Womens rights

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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