Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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A man walked into a bar. Ow!

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

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Knock Knock! Well come on in!

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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