Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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